Friday, May 6, 2011

Thoughts About Mothers and Fathers

My friend David lost his father today to cancer. I can imagine what he's going through, but it's just speculation and sympathy. I have no way of knowing the pain and loss that he's feeling. I've realized over a lifetime of days like this that you can feel sad for your friends, and you can feel relief that their loved one isn't in pain any longer, but there's just nothing to be said. There are no words you can say that will bring their loved one back to them. You can't fix it for them. All you can really do is be around if they do want to talk...or if they don't.

 You can also be thankful for the loved ones you do have, whether they be partners, parents, children, siblings or friends who might as well be siblings. I thought long and hard today about my own family's relationship. There have been ups and downs, like with any family, but late last year was a turning point for us in that we all seem to appreciate each other more now. We try to watch our mouths more as not to piss each other off. We do little things to show each other that we love each other. I'm thankful for that beyond words. I know that, God forbid, if something was to happen to any of them, I'm at peace with them and they know I love them. I think in the end, that's really the best we can do in the face of the inevitable.

Over my lifetime, I've been incredibly blessed to meet a great many people who I have loved, learned from and befriended. I have always known that if the worst happened, I have a roof over my head and somewhere to have a meal. I have always known the companionship of friends. Friends have become brothers, sisters, fathers and mothers to me. I hope that these dear people know how I feel about them, b/c they have made my life full and interesting. I have never walked completely alone...I've never had to. For that, I am extremely thankful tonight.

I don't know when my own Dad's time will come, but I know that he has been more than a father to me over the years. He's been a hero, an enemy at times...but always loving and present, and more often than not, a wise friend who believes in me. When it is his time, or mine, I'll know that we loved, understood and respected each other before it was over. And I can't ask for more than that. In fact, I'm damn lucky.

To my own Mom, I love you, Mom. Thank you for everything. Happy Mother's Day.

To Melissa, thank you so much for our children, and your love for them. They are the light of my life. Happy Mother's Day.

Finally, to all the ladies who have been like mothers to me (I think you know who you are,) thank you all for your love and support. Happy Mother's Day.

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